13:15

Acordei por volta das 10. O Pacinone está-me a fazer dormir como nunca. Aparentemente a Scully esteve em grande agição a noite toda a não deixou a Dalila dormir como deve ser… já eu, que costumo acordar por tudo e por nada nem dei por isso.

Levantei-me pesadamente da cama e preparei-me para ir até ao ginásio. Estava cheio. O Governo deu o dia de hoje í  Função Pública e deve haver montes de empresas a dar o dia aos empregados também. Enfim, deu para fazer o nosso programinha. Fizemos pernas e ombros, mas resolvemos duplicar o peso da prensa. Não foi muito boa ideia.

Há que tempos que não fazia prensa e passar de 50 para 100 kg foi devastador, mas consigo manter-me de pé. Mas enfim, tudo vai ao sí­tio. Já não falta muito para voltarmo s í  velha forma e continuarmos a evolução que ficou suspensa ao deixarmos de ir em Agosto passado. Ainda é um pouco estranho escrever em português num diário que ando a escrever em inglês há sete meses, mas não me parece que vá ter muita dificuldade em habituar-me.

O importante agora é ir ao trabalho… vejamos a minha lista: Tenho que fazer duas maquetes para um novo site, mais uma molhada de cartoons para outro projecto, continuo í  espera que o Paco me mande uma foto dele para fazer ensaios de caricaturas para o site dele, preciso também de fazer a preparação inicial desse mesmo site, depois preciso de investigar um cliente novo que telefonou hoje bem como os sites que esse cliente citou como referência, preciso de encontrar um host que aceite chat rooms, já que a Pair recusa terminantemente e temos um cliente que as quer, tenho que encontrar um encoder de MP3 grátis para Linux (não deve ser difí­cil) e, finalmente, tenho que fazer a tira do Sapo ainda hoje dentro do horário de expediente porque amanhã é feriado e terça-feira o pessoal da Saber e Lazer não trabalha e ninguém coloca o cartoon desta semana… ah, é verdade, tenho que ir até ao nosso apartado para ver se há correio.

Adoro telefonar para o serviço BES directo e ouvir a voz gravada dizer o saldo… um milhão… soa tão bem “um milhão”… claro que vai soar ainda mais quando forem mais milhões, ou mesmo quando o milhão for de Euro. Claro que não é um milhão… é um milhão e novecentos mil… o que soa ainda melhor :)

18:55

Acabei agora de passar a tinta a tira do Sapo para esta semana, não sei se ainda vai a tempo de alguém de lá a colocar na página devida antes do feriado e o pior é que no Sapo ninguém trabalha amanhã, nem depois. Bom, não vale a pena entrar em pânico (aliás, desde que tomo o Pacinone custa-me cada vez mais entrar em pânico). Vou simplesmente seguir o ritmo normal, deixar secar a tinta, acabar as letras, desenhar os quadrados, digitalizar, pintar, integrar no layout com o copyright, optimizar e enviar.

Entretanto estou a aproveitar o tempo que desenho para gravar uns MP3 de um velho LP do Mike Oldfield, chamado “Collaborations” que prometi a um tipo que me mandou um CD-ROM, aqui há uns tempos. O Cool Edit Pro é tão bom a retirar clicks e pops de discos velhos, bem como ruí­dos constantes que os MP3 vão ficar excelentes. Aliás, sou capaz de ficar com eles para mim.

Man am I pissed today! I’m this close to simply saying: Linux sucks I want it deleted from my computer asap.

I mean… it is SO frustrating!!!!

I hate Windows, but look… the other day I wanted to get a new version of a newsreader I love, called FreeAgent. I looked for it and found it, downloaded it and ran the intalation prog. The install detected my older 16-bit version and asked me if I wanted the replace it while keeping the data, I said yes, intstallation proceeded and I was using it in 5 minutes.

Today I wanted to get a news program for Linux that allowed me to decode binary attachments with the same ease that the Agent does. So I go to freshmeat.net and seacrh for newsreaders, sure enough an incomprehensible list of software apears… everything is called Kwmem or Xtrkuo or asnJXhs… there’s no understanding or even memorising the name of ANY of these programs.

OK, so I found one that seemed interesting and I downloaded it. I read the README and then the INSTALL file. I follow the clear instructions one by one and it doesn’t work. There’s an error saying I’m missing Qt. “Sure”, I think… if this was Windows I could be missing, say, Direct X to play a game or VB runtimes to run some shitty program.

I go looking for Qt, find it and download it. So now I have to install Qt… but to do that I have to create either a .profile or a .login file, according to whichever shell I’m using (which, I haven’t the slightest clue), in my home directory… OK, so I create BOTH files, in my /home directory… did it work? No, of course not.

So, in the space of half an hour, including download I was up and running FreeAgent for windows, and in the space of 3 and a half hours, including two downloads I was runnning nothing on Linux.

Plus, this isn’t the first time! I tried to install ICQ… forget it… and other stuff, even really really simple stuff, but it’s always a hel of a mess… it took me over two weeks to get to connect to the internet.

I’m starting to wonder: WHAT’S THE BLOODY POINT?!?!

Does windows crahs? Yes! Is it a security black hole? yes! Does it suck in general and have stupid features? Absolutely. But it runs, it installs programs and runs them… and I don’t need a computer science degree to do it.

It is a sacred day.

It’s the day that the Phantom Menace opens, and the day I am going to see it for the first time ever.

Thanks to the tranquilizers I’m on, I’m quite calm, but still, filled with atecipation. I can barely begin to imagine what it’s going to be like to see a new Star Wars movie after all these years.

Expect a detailed report later on…. and may the force be with you!

Later….

Well, this pushed the happiness bar for today to the top!

What a treat! Star Wars, Episode I, the Phantom Menace simply kicked butt. The sets are absolutely astounding, the effects are out of this world or should I say galaxy?), and seeing two Jedis in action with their lightsabers is simply too much for a fanatic like me.

I was a bit disappointed by a few things though. Firstly, the movie took 5 months to open here, so I pretty much knew the whole story by the time I actually sat down and saw it.

Then, and this is more movie-related, I think there was someting lacking… I can’t quite explain. But I suppose there was a lot of indefinition in the characters and that Qui Gon was a bit of a waste of time. If Lucas came here to tell the story so we could understand the past behind the three movies already made, then why come up with a main character that has no continuity (meaning, he dies at the end)? I would much rather have liked to see Obi Wan take on a leading role, making it more interesting as a developing character for Episode II.

As a last complaint I’d like to ask for more space in the next movies please… this *is* Star Wars, but someone seemed to have forgotten about the space, there’s but one space battle in which we don’t really get to know the types of fighters involved and all that. The hi-tech centre piece of the movie is the pod race, which is set on land… I think everyone missed the x-wings and TIE fighters whizzing by at incredible speed spitting blaster rays and the Millennium Falcon doing stunts… there just isn’t enough of that.

On the other hand, there is quite a lot furious light saber action, which is a definite plus! Even so…. and even the whole fighting style has been MUCH improved, I still think the final battle between Luke and Vader in “Return of the Jedi” has much more drama to it. There isn’t so much spinning and whirling, but there’s more fury and strenght.

Oh, a small embarrassin note… the whole theatre cheered and applauded when Obi Wan chops Darth Maul in two… I can’t believe it… :/

Anyway, I’m going to see it again next week! Don’t get the wrong impression, I LOVED the movie, it’s fantastic, even Jar Jar Binks wasn’t all THAT bad, it’s just that I think my expectations were set waaaaaaaay to high.

Give it up for drugs! I don’t remember sleeping this good for ages!

I think I’m going to love these pills… now let’s see what they can do for me during the day, whether or nor they reduce my normal agitated self. More news as they come along…

Later…….

My bum hurts. I’ve been doing lunges at the gym and it really works the buttocks. I suppose it just means I’ll have a good ass to wear 1970’s style tight pants. Which is nice.

Had quite a good day, I’m wondering if the pills are having such a good effect or if they’re half acting as medication, half as psychological stimulation. Anyway I finished a couple of layouts for a new site and a cartoon rough for a client, it’s all online to be presented tomorrow.

We’re also redesigning the biggest search engine in the country… and IT’S A MESS! We can hardly believe anyone as actually used it recently. They have become a portal as well, but the information is scattered, terribly organized and the connection between portal and search engine is a ghastly mess. This is going to be a challenge and it’s going to bring us a lot of attention. We’re talking media, this time.

Notice how my levels have gone down! I’m less stressed (actually, I’m a little stoned at the time), the mess is down a lot, since we recently cleaned the house, my to do bar is also down a bit, cause I got a few things out of the way today. Nice.

I think I’m going to bed now, let’s see how tomorrow goes…

[tags]drugs,anxiety,SAPO[/tags]

The day went fairly ok… went to deposit the checks, totaling 5.252 Euro (vat included, which will be delivered to the taxman :) soon).

I started work on a new site for a client, and it’s going fairly well, once again.

At the end of the afternoon I went to meet my parents at the gym and they gave me some pills, Pacinone 40 is the name, halazepam is the ingredient. Never took it, so I’m going to start on a rather low dosage, half in the morning, half at night.

We’ll see if it works or not… keep your eyes on the stress bar :)

Note: I just saved the 29th entry over the 28th entry. FUCK! I hate when this happens… anyway, I’m not writing it all again, so here’s the breakdown:

– went to a 4 hour meeting, got a check
– Dee got my mail: another check there
– Dee got accepted as a design teacher at the school where I teach
– I have admitted to myself having a problem, so my parents are going to medicate me with some pills to try and control my anxiety

Later…..

Well, it’s now a bit over midnight, I just finished watching “The X-Files: Fight the Future” with Dee. My heart kept racing, not that I was terribly excited about the movie (although I did like it, I’d seen it before)… I was just in my normal state of anxiety.

But -AHA!- this time I have drugs! I just took my pill and I’m hoping it really works. Anyway, since I can take up to three a day I can always increase the dosage, provided my parents tell me so, of course.

I’m going to have to wait up to an hour for the pill to take effect. In the meanwhile I’m waiting for Nort… there he is on the mobile! He’s coming online for a little game of Quake hehehehe, let’s turn all this anxiety into rockets!!